It seems odd, but it's true: most of the people who are victims of abuse fail to realize how much danger they are actually in. They don't know what constitutes abuse and they are unable to identify it. These 10 signs are indications that you are in an abusive and dangerous relationship. If any of these apply to you, you should get out.
1. Your partner continually threatens to kill him or herself or threatens to hurt or kill you and your children.
2. Your significant other threatens you repeatedly if you make any move to get out of the bad relationship.
3. You partner gets very jealous and possessive and tries to tell you who you are allowed to talk to.
4. You partner does not value you or the contributions you make to your relationship or your home.
5. You significant other yells constantly and refuses to admit that your opinions are valid and should be considered.
6. You partner blames you for making him or her treat you abusively.
7. Your partner does not consider your feelings and humiliates you in front of others.
8. You often feel like you deserve to be mistreated and abused.
9. You are depressed and feel like you are helpless in the situation.
10. You walk on eggshells, afraid that anything you do or say will have negative consequences.
If any of these things pertain to you, you should find help.
Unfortunately, it is more like that domestic violence will be swept under the rug by the victim's family as well as the victim herself. This perpetuates the abusive cycle, because the only way to end the violence is to acknowledge what is going on and accept that it is not right. No one should ever be made to feel like they are anything less than a human being with feelings and ideas that should be respected. Once help is sought, moving on is the next step. Getting better can be a long road. The goal is to work towards feelings of empowerment and to avoid self-loathing. Learn Self Defense with a martial arts class or by trying out a new self defense video if you want, but do something to change the present course of your life.
The thing about domestic abuse and domestic violence cases it that they tend to get worse and worse over time. In the beginning threats may be all you experience. Eventually, though things may escalate to the point where victims suffer physical injury. Bruises, bumps, scars, black eyes, and broken bones can lead to other problems and the trauma of these events can lead victims to suffer from an array of psychological problems as well.
Depression and the inability to form healthy relationships are common problems for the abused. Recovery is possible, however, and victims should seek counseling and/or group therapy to start working towards health and healing. It's never too late to end the cycle of abuse.
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