I know that this is supposed to be the family section of your favorite blog or news site, but bear with me while I explore in this article a subject that can be controversial: why should we have children?
It's a nonsensical question to many, almost like asking, why bother living? But popular or not, it's one deserving of a thoughtful response. After all, it's arguable that life is about procreation. Observing the world around us, we see that the sole purpose of non-human living things is to simply bring forth the next generation. Much effort is involved, and it is all unquestionably devoted to living long enough to pass on one's genes. This is simply the point of life for many.
But should the same be true for human beings? I'm not asking whether it is - it undoubtedly is - but should it? Many cultures harbor the humorous stereotype of aging parents nagging their children to "settle down" and beget children of their own. And very few question the imperative, except on practical grounds of finances and the like. But the philosophically minded have long puzzled over this incessant demand, not only of parents but of society; you are not whole or fully mature until you have taken on the responsibility of rearing children.
Why is this? I don't mean from a biological perspective - the sexual urge is present even in the most demure of us. But why is it so psychologically important for people to have children? It's not merely sex, because it only takes sex to conceive, and of course one could use other means of begetting children of one's one or simply adopt those of others and make them one's own. One of the most prominent ideas is simply to have an heir - one to pass down all your experiences and opinions for the sake of continuing one's lineage and sustaining their presence in society, even if only in name. People wish to be remembered, and one's own offspring are most adept at remembering one the way they'd like to be remembered.
But why the psychological importance attached to all this? Even for individuals who recognize the Sisyphean absurdity involved, a sense of lack may still pervade a deliberately empty nest. Given that the reproductive process is so radically different between men and women, the answers to this question are going to be different for each as well. Women, charged with carrying and nurturing a pregnancy for nine months are vastly more invested, whereas men have no natural obligation to attend to their young after conception. Because of their lack of a stake and their ability to simply flee, men are more likely to see less of an obligation to procreate, instead catering to their more simplistic carnal instincts.
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Written by Paul Wise, who has procreated before and recommends OnTheMarkBlog.com for more reading on the subject of breeding and why he deeply regrets it.
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